"Marley and Marley" is a song from the 1992 film The Muppet Christmas Carol. It features the Marley Brothers (played by Statler and Waldorf) singing about the evil actions they committed that caused their fate, while also warning Ebenezer Scrooge that the same fate awaits him if he does not change his ways.
It was performed by Statler's performer Jerry Nelson, Waldorf's performer Dave Goelz and a chorus as the chains.
[It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow men]
[And if that spirit goes not forth in life, he is condemned to do so after death]
[To witness what he can not share, but might have shared and turned to happiness]
We're Marley and Marley, avarice and greed
We took advantage of the poor, just ignored the needy
We specialized in causing pain, spreading fear and doubt
And if you could not pay the rent, we simply threw you out!
[There was the year we evicted the entire orphanage!]
[I remember the little tykes all standing in the snow bank]
[With their little frostbitten teddy bears!]
We're Marley and Marley, our hearts were painted black
We should have known our evil deeds would put us both in shackles
Captive, bound, we're double-ironed, exhausted by the weight
As freedom comes from giving love
So, prison comes with hate
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
[True, there was something about mankind we loved]
[I think it was their money!]
Doomed, Scrooge! You're doomed for all time!
Your future is a horror story, written by your crime
Your chains are forged by what you say and do
So, have your fun; when life is done, a nightmare waits for you
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
[Change!]
[It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow men]
[And if that spirit goes not forth in life, he is condemned to do so after death]
[To witness what he can not share, but might have shared and turned to happiness]
We're Marley and Marley, avarice and greed
We took advantage of the poor, just ignored the needy
We specialized in causing pain, spreading fear and doubt
And if you could not pay the rent, we simply threw you out!
[There was the year we evicted the entire orphanage!]
[I remember the little tykes all standing in the snow bank]
[With their little frostbitten teddy bears!]
We're Marley and Marley, our hearts were painted black
We should have known our evil deeds would put us both in shackles
Captive, bound, we're double-ironed, exhausted by the weight
As freedom comes from giving love
So, prison comes with hate
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
[True, there was something about mankind we loved]
[I think it was their money!]
Doomed, Scrooge! You're doomed for all time!
Your future is a horror story, written by your crime
Your chains are forged by what you say and do
So, have your fun; when life is done, a nightmare waits for you
[Funny?]
[Money?]
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
(We're Marley and Marley)
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley and now it's time to part
To go back where they keep our kind
The wretched and the heartless
The news we shared has got you scared
We're glad that we got through
So make amends
And make some friends
The future's up to you!
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
We're Marley and Marley
(Whooo)
[Change!]
Other Appearances
The original song included additional lyrics and dialogue, but they were cut for unknown reasons. The full version is featured on home release special features and the film's soundtrack.
