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"I've Got a Little List" is a deleted song from the animated television series Family Guy that was meant to appear in the season six episode "Lois Kills Stewie". It features Stewie Griffin after conquering the world, singing about his list of people that he hates or annoy him and his desire of eliminating them. It was cut from the episode due to time issues. It is a parody of the song of the same name from the 1885 operetta The Mikado.

It was performed by Stewie's voice actor and creator of the show Seth McFarlene and a chorus as Stewie's bodyguards.

Lyrics

As someday it may happen that a victim must be found
I've got a little list, I've got a little list
Of society offenders who might well be underground
And who never would be missed, who never would be missed

There's the white kid with the baggy clothes who's talking like he's black
The girl you date who doesn't get the jokes in Caddyshack
The Asian guy who cuts in front of every single line
And Britney Spears for accidentally showing her vagine
And Bill O'Reilly's ineffective dermatologist

They'd none of them be missed, they'd none of them be missed

He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And they'd none of them be missed
They'd none of them be missed

There's the guy behind the news reporter waving like a fool
And Senator Bill Frist, I've got him on the list
And the fat kid smiling warmly while he's peeing in the pool
He never would be missed, he never would be missed

There's the foul-smelling boy who comes to school in camouflage
And every bleeding member of the cast of Entourage
And while we're on the subject, HBO deserves a whack
For ending The Sopranos with a f*cking cut to black!

And guys who when you shake their hand just bump you with their fist
I don't think they'd be missed. I'm sure they'd not be missed

He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And they'd none of them be missed
They'd none of them be missed

There's the guy who sits beside you and keeps farting on the plane
And Shakira's lyricist. I've got him on the list
And the smarty on Thanksgiving who says, "It's the trip-toe-fane!"
He never would be missed, he never would be missed

There's the blonde who tells you loudly with a voice just like a knife
"You know, someone should do a sitcom based around my life!"
The guy who watched The Simpsons back in 1994
And won't admit the damn thing isn't funny anymore

And anyone
And every one...
Who's ever...
Made me pissed!

Made me pissed!
Made me really really pissed!

I've got them on the list
They'd none of them be missed

They'd be none, they'd be...
They'd be none, they'd be none of them be missed

He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And they'd none of them be missed...

They'd none

None of them...
Of...
None of them...
Them...
None of them

Be...
Missed!

None of them be missed!

Other Appearances

  • While the song was cut for the TV version of the episode, it was included on the DVD version of it.
  • The song was released as a single.

Gallery

Images

Videos

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