"Fright of Their Lives" is a song from the stage musical adaptation of Beetlejuice. It features Beetlejuice trying to teach the Maitlands how to be scary, while also starting to reveal his true intentions.

The song was performed by Beetlejuice's actor Alex Brightman, Barbara Maitland's actress Kerry Butler, and Adam Maitland's actor Rob McClure.


Listen up, I'm not gonna lie
Right now, you couldn't frighten a fly
Or scare a seagull off of a fry
You ever stop to ask yourselves "why?"

Both of you are super polite
Middle class, suburban, and white
Well, all of that is finished tonight
Except for the white part

Take your places
I want scary faces
Now go!
Not bad

Sever a head
Preferably someone you know

[Look at me, I'm so scary.]

Don't be so vanilla
Would a little anger kill ya?
C'mon, drop your panties
I'm trying to fill ya
With wisdom and skill
And the instinct to kill

[Again, we do not want to kill anyone!]
[Fine! But somehow, someway, you gotta make 'em see ya. I'm talkin' jump-scares, the jerky Japanese ghost-walk]
[Plus—learn to throw your voice! Fool your friends! Fun at parties!]
[Now that is cool! I wanna do that!]

Whatever it takes to make 'em go crazy
Raising the stakes by punching a baby
Scare 'em awake till they break
They'll be quaking in fright

'Cause you've got some evil deep down inside you
Put all the farmer's markets behind you
You've gotta work
Gotta haunt till it hurts
Through the night
And give those guys the fright of their lives
Yeah yeah!

Let's start with things that you hate
Well, hate's a very strong word
Perhaps when people are late
Or getting pooped on by birds?

No, what fills you with rage?
Being mean to a pet
Chefs who use too much sage when they make beurre noisette
Over-glutinous food
Or when kids call me "dude"
Oh, I find that so rude!

Well, there's lots there to use
Take a deep breath
And give me your best primal scream

[Barbara, that was brilliant!]

Try it again
Maybe this time pretend like you mean it

[That was even better!

I want freedom
But to get my freedom, I need them
To get a living person to say my name
(Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse?)

I know that beggars can't be choosers
But do they have to be such losers?
Both of them are deathly dull and lame
(Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse)

Why God-slash-Satan, did you send these bed wetters?
Even, like, a tax attorney would've been better
Somebody with gravitas
Somebody to fear who—

[Excuse me, Mr. Betelgeuse]
[We can kind of hear you]

[Yeah? Well that was a soliloquy so you're the one who's being rude]

Whatever it takes to make 'em go crazy
Turn all the lights on
Dress like a baby
[Adam, I don't]

Get your heads in the game
Let's hide their phones!

Screw their phones!
Ugh, these dopes are both hopeless
How will I ever survive?
Unless they get the fright of their lives
(Yes yes, we're feelin' it, they're gonna feel it, we're killin' it! )
They gotta get the fright of their lives
(We're scary, very very scary!)
They'll never get the fright of their lives

Other Appearances

  • The song was featured on the show's soundtrack.




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