I'm Number One

"I'm Number One" is a song from the 2014 film Muppets Most Wanted. It is performed by Constantine and Dominic Badguy as they discuss which one of them is superior.

The song was performed by Constantine (performed by Matt Vogel) and Badguy's actor, Ricky Gervais.

Lyrics[]

I'm number one,
You're number two
We're criminals at large
But I'm at larger than you

I'm number one,
You're number two
I believe in equality
As long as you get less than me!

I'm one,
You're one
You're number two
I'm number two
You may think that you're smarter,
But I'm smarter-er than you!

I'm number one!
You're number two!
You're lucky to be number two
Not number three!

I can see by the look in your eye
You want to get the bigger piece of the pie
One day, you'll get your chance
But in the meantime, you've got to dance monkey dance!

[Really? I hate dancing.]

[Do it!]

Dance monkey dance!
Ha Ha!

I'm number two
He's number one
I can't believe I'm working for an amphibian
I'm number two
He's number one

I'm number one!

You know life's gone to the dogs when your boss is a frog!

I can see it's just a matter of time
Before he's gone and I'm at the front of the line!
It won't be long 'til I get my chance
But in the meantime, I've got to dance monkey dance

Dance monkey dance!

[Now, watch me!]

I'm number one!
He's number one!
You're number two!
I'm number two!

That's it, kid, there you go
Now step aside, this ain't your show!

I'm one
I'm one
I'm number one!
Yes, we know!

I'm/He's number one!

[That's how it's done!]

Other Appearances[]

It was a feature on the movie's soundtrack.

Gallery[]

Images[]

Videos[]

Official[]

I'm Number One Muppets Most Wanted

Covers[]

I'm Number One (From "Muppets Most Wanted")

Trivia[]

The song had a one-line reprise cut for time purposes. This can be heard in the film's extended edition.

Songs

Disney Animated Flims
A Special Sort of Death • Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee • I've Got No Strings • Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee (Reprise) • The Coach to Pleasure Island • Night on Bald Mountain • Hit the Big Boss (For a Raise) • Pink Elephants on Parade • Man Returns • Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum • Headless Horseman • Sing, Sweet Nightingale • The Walrus and the Carpenter • 'Twas Brillig • Painting the Roses Red • March of the Cards • Who's Been Painting My Roses Red? • The Unbirthday Song (Reprise) • A Pirate's Life (Is a Wonderful Life) • A Pirate's Life (Reprise) • The Elegant Captain Hook • The Siamese Cat Song • Cruella De Vil • Mad Madam Mim • I Wanna Be Like You • Trust in Me • The Phony King of England • Heffalumps and Woozles • A Huntin' Man • The Horned King • The World's Greatest Criminal Mind • Goodbye, So Soon • Poor Unfortunate Souls • Les Poissons • Poor Unfortunate Souls (Reprise) • Home on the Range • Belle • Gaston • Gaston (Reprise) • The Mob Song • Prince Ali (Reprise) • Be Prepared • Stampede • The Virginia Company • The Virginia Company (Reprise) • Mine, Mine, Mine • Savages, Pt. 1 • Savages, Pt. 2 • The Bells of Notre Dame • Out There • Hellfire • Paris Burning • And He Shall Smite the Wicked • The Gospel Truth II • Perfect World • Kronk's Theme Music • The Firebird Suite • (You're The) Devil in Disguise • Yodel-Adle-Eedle-Idle-Oo • Friends on the Other Side • Friends on the Other Side (Reprise) • Healing Incantation • Mother Knows Best • Mother Knows Best (Reprise) • The Backson Song • March of the Oreo • Love is an Open Door • Wolves • Kakamora • Shiny • Know Who You Are • At All Costs • This Is The Thanks I Get?! • Knowing What I Know Now

Pixar Films
La Cucaracha • Kronos Unveiled • Rollin' in the Rearview • Songbird • Song of Mor'du • Remember Me • Much Needed Advice • La Llorona • Midnight, The Stars And You

Animated Sequels
I'm Looking Out for Me • Forget About Love • You're Only Second Rate • Welcome to the Forty Thieves • Are You In or Out? • Don't Fall in Love • Things Are Not What They Appear • My Lullaby • Not One of Us • Junkyard Society Rag • Here We Go Another Plan • Feel Like a Million • Perfectly Perfect • Just One Mistake

Other Animated Films
Everybody's Got A Laughin' Place • It's a "B" Movie • Cutting Edge • Worthless • Kidnap the Sandy Claws • Oogie Boogie's Song • Gloomius Maximus • I, Ivan Krank • Petey's King of France • Chains of Love • It's Our House Now • If I Ruled the World • Sidekicks and Henchmen • The Frigate That Flies • Alone on Halloween

Live Action Films
We Won't Be Happy 'Till We Get It! • Castle In Spain • Fidelity Fiduciary Bank • The Happiest Home in These Hills • Passamaquoddy • Every Little Piece • Bill of Sale • Scrooge • Marley and Marley • Come Little Children • I Put a Spell on You • Shiver My Timbers • A Professional Pirate • Secret of Survival • Little Girls • Easy Street • Little Girls (Reprise) • Bravo, Stromboli! • The Kraken • Davy Jones • Fabulous • North Pole, North Pole • Hello, Little Girl • Stay with Me • Agony • Last Midnight • Once Upon A Dream •My Jolly Sailor Bold • Mermaids • Rainbow Connection (Moopets Version) •Let's Talk About Me • I'm Number One • I'll Get You What You Want (Cockatoo in Malibu) • Rotten to the Core • Evil Like Me • Evil • Ways to Be Wicked • What's My Name? • Chillin' Like a Villain • It's Goin' Down • What a Shame • Queen of Mean • Call Me Cruella • Sympathy for the Devil • One Way or Another • Tie the Knot Tango • The Coachman To Pleasure Island • The Witches Are Back • Behemooth • Ode to the Falling

Animated Series & Shorts
The Skeleton Dance • Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? • Der Fuehrer's Face • The Best of Everything • Fat Cat Stomp • The Lobster Mobster's Mob • The Beddy Bye Blues • You Wouldn't Want to Mess With Me (Part 1) • You Wouldn't Want to Mess With Me (Part 2) • Evil Lullaby • My Town • One Good Man • Yzmopolis • Boom-Da-Boom • Let's Slay The Beast • Mortimer Mouse • Cedric the Great • All You Desire • Helping Hand • A Kingdom of My Own • This Fliegel Has Landed • Wendell's Way • My Evil Dreams • My Power Will Be Crystal Clear • Get Wicked • On Your/My Own • Lord Dominator's Theme • Let the Pun Fit the Crime • Mandrake's Evil Jam • I'm the Bad Guy • Tonight We Strike • Jackal Style • Outta the Way • Panic and Run • Lions Over All • We'll Make You a Meal • Bring Back a Legend • I Have A Plan • Big Bad Kenge • We're the Smartest • Let Me Make You Proud • Let Me Make You Proud (Reprise) • Ready As I'll Ever Be • I'm Gonna Run This Dump • Li'l Ol' Me • Weirdmageddon Theme • We'll Meet Again • You Can't Catch Me • Don't Look Now • The Art of the Steal • We've Got Dance Power • Sky Pirates • Decay Incantation • Waiting in the Wings • Crossing The Line • Waiting in the Wings (Reprise) • Nothing Left to Lose • Goblin Jail • GlomTales Theme Song • I'm Not Very Nice • Heartstomper • Sasha Theme Song Takeover • Whatcha Playin’? • If We’re Gonna Play Owl House… • Blame It on Toby • Killjoy • Evil As Can Be

Deleted Songs
Rolling Along to Pleasure Island • I'm Odd • Beware the Jabberwock • Never Smile at a Crocodile • The Pirate Song • Evil - Evil • The Mighty Hunters • Don't Buy a Parrot from a Sailor • The Creation of Cruella De Vil • How Much You Mean to Me/Court Me Slowly • Not in Nottingham (Prince John Demo) • Silence is Golden • All Good Things Must End • Arabian Nights (Reprise 1) • Arabian Nights (Reprise 2) • Why Me? • Humiliate the Boy • My Finest Hour • Be Prepared (Reprise) • Born to Be Bad • Snuff Out the Light • Perfect World (Yzma) • Gonna Get My Wish • You're You • Life's Too Short • It's Gonna Get Weird • Hans of the Southern Isles (Reprise 2)

Theatrical Songs
Another Pyramid • Like Father Like Son • Me • Maison Des Lunes • Chow Down • The Madness of King Scar • It's Never Too Late • I Want the Good Times Back • Sweet Child • Les Poissons (Reprise) • I Want the Good Times Back (Reprise) • Sweet Child (Reprise) • Sweet Child (Reprise) • Diamond in the Rough • Make a Little Noise •Flower of Gold • The Bottom Line • The Bottom Line (Reprise) • Hans of the Southern Isles • Hans of the Southern Isles (Reprise) • I Knew I Smelled A Rat • Prologue • 'Night, Kittens

Video Games
I Love Fur • Puppies, Oh, Puppies • The Rat Tango • Go Bananas in the Coconut Tree • A Mood for Food • Run • Villains of a Sort • The Heartless Has Come • Squirming Evil • One-Winged Angel • Dr. Finkelstein's Song • Hail to Mr. Oogie • Casino Clash • A Filthy Finale • Organization XIII • The 13th Struggle • Ursula's Revenge • It's a Small World • Opening • The Mad Doctor Isn't Mad • I'm Falling Apart • The Fall of Prescott • The Mad Doctor's Plan • Mad Doctor's Wonderful World of Evil • Piece of My World

Promotional Songs
Honest John • Monstro the Whale • If You Wanna See Some Strange Behavior (Take a Look at Man) • The Legend of Davy Jones • Cruella • I'm Gettin' Good at Being Bad • Shadow Man • Do What I Wanna Do • Love is a Magical Mystery

Parks
Hawaiian War Chant • Yo Ho (A Pirate's Life for Me) • Grim Grinning Ghosts • Burrow's Lament • Friend Like Iago • Uh-Oa's Song • Guardians of the Galaxy Monsters After Dark

Songs

The Muppets
A Bundle to Be Made • Scrooge • Marley and Marley • When Love is Gone • Shiver My Timbers • Sailing for Adventure • A Professional Pirate • Make it Mine • Rainbow Connection (Moopets Version) • Let's Talk About Me • I'm Number One • I'll Get You What You Want (Cockatoo in Malibu) • Tie the Knot Tango

Creature Shop
Cold-Blooded Guy • Underground • Magic Dance • Chilly Down • As the World Falls Down • Within You